The Time of Ezra
I suppose we could say we survived, possibly more Ezra's first birthday, bringing us into the time one year ago that he was with us. We were still in Alaska, that blissful almost euphoric time in our lives that I cherish greatly.
How to honor Ezra's short life baffeled me until almost too close to his birthday. I wanted to do something lasting but buying him something he will never use every time a significant anniversary rolls around will only leave me with a pile of things that don't really hold value as much as his memory. We woke up early, Ezra woke us up early to be born (he kept me up all night) but we brought ourselves with the kids in pjs just the same out to a grassy spot on a hill next to the river for some time of peace and reflection. In the evening we planted peach trees, it was a small scramble coming up with the 3 we did. I found one at Mel's it's the Ezra tree and mom found 2 more at a farmer's market nearby, they'd been through a lot to get to life in Ezra's peach garden, seemed fitting. The whole family helped dig the holes, even the kiddos. It was what it was and I felt at peace about it.
How to honor Ezra's short life baffeled me until almost too close to his birthday. I wanted to do something lasting but buying him something he will never use every time a significant anniversary rolls around will only leave me with a pile of things that don't really hold value as much as his memory. We woke up early, Ezra woke us up early to be born (he kept me up all night) but we brought ourselves with the kids in pjs just the same out to a grassy spot on a hill next to the river for some time of peace and reflection. In the evening we planted peach trees, it was a small scramble coming up with the 3 we did. I found one at Mel's it's the Ezra tree and mom found 2 more at a farmer's market nearby, they'd been through a lot to get to life in Ezra's peach garden, seemed fitting. The whole family helped dig the holes, even the kiddos. It was what it was and I felt at peace about it.
Comments
I stumbled across this blog on accident and I'm not sure what to write, but I want to leave something.
I love you and Abe and the boys (all three of them).
Thank you for taking the time and having the guts to share your thoughts and your grief and your memories. I know it wasn’t easy – but you’re an incredible writer and I admire you in so many ways.
[I've probably typed about 50 things and deleted them... maybe I'll find a way to say them later.]
Love you.
Nathan