Let the Year-agos begin
One year ago we decided to head to Alaska, which for me seems as the beginning of Ezra. I feel like I'm dragging my feet deep in the sand trying to hold onto that time, more so than anyone else in the world, such a lonely thought. If I could right now I'd pull up and go back to Alaska. I think my heart, that of a mother, will always be searching for him in a tangible way, it's not right that I'm empty handed, and maybe my instincts feel closer to him there, at least they felt closer to God.
I like Virginia. She's a customer at the fabric store. As far as I can tell she doesn't have a kids...but I don't really know. The first time I met her she fell in love with my tatoo. Since then we've had a quiet understanding, she's intuitive and radiates spiritual confidence. She works at a public school as a teacher. I wish Malachi could have her. She's imaginative, creative and feels very stifiled by the system. I hope she continues to bring color to a very drab routine that is public school for these kids.
My friend Laura has good news, a child she lost just over a year ago will soon be in her arms. It's been a long road for her that started with the fact that her an her husband are not able to have biological children. Their first is Livia, a beautiful little girl from Guatemala, who wears a peasant skirt better than anyone I know. Their second adoption was a little guy from here in the states who came out of some social nightmare where the mom had more kids than she could handle at a very young age, I wish I knew him better but he's shy. Sooner than Kyle and Laura had planned news came that Asher's mom was pregnant and would like for them to adopt little Ovi. Elated they made many preperations to welcome him into their family. Something went terrible wrong and when Laura went to bring him home the mother decided she would rather keep him. Laura was left empty handed. In my loss she's been a beautiful friend. Offering the gift of music and support of a woman whose felt loss and longing. On Tuesday she will travel with the family to Mississippi to bring him home to be with them forever, his mom doesn't want him anymore.
Today my greatest longing is confused in Laura's excitement. I don't even know how to say this without sounding completely inadequate......keeping it short. Oh, how I wish in some months I would get a phone call that ended this hell and brought him back to me. I feel like telling her over and over again how wonderful I think this is because I cannot have it, and she can, and it's going to bring healing and blessing, and somehow in all of it there is Providence.
Boise here we come.
I like Virginia. She's a customer at the fabric store. As far as I can tell she doesn't have a kids...but I don't really know. The first time I met her she fell in love with my tatoo. Since then we've had a quiet understanding, she's intuitive and radiates spiritual confidence. She works at a public school as a teacher. I wish Malachi could have her. She's imaginative, creative and feels very stifiled by the system. I hope she continues to bring color to a very drab routine that is public school for these kids.
My friend Laura has good news, a child she lost just over a year ago will soon be in her arms. It's been a long road for her that started with the fact that her an her husband are not able to have biological children. Their first is Livia, a beautiful little girl from Guatemala, who wears a peasant skirt better than anyone I know. Their second adoption was a little guy from here in the states who came out of some social nightmare where the mom had more kids than she could handle at a very young age, I wish I knew him better but he's shy. Sooner than Kyle and Laura had planned news came that Asher's mom was pregnant and would like for them to adopt little Ovi. Elated they made many preperations to welcome him into their family. Something went terrible wrong and when Laura went to bring him home the mother decided she would rather keep him. Laura was left empty handed. In my loss she's been a beautiful friend. Offering the gift of music and support of a woman whose felt loss and longing. On Tuesday she will travel with the family to Mississippi to bring him home to be with them forever, his mom doesn't want him anymore.
Today my greatest longing is confused in Laura's excitement. I don't even know how to say this without sounding completely inadequate......keeping it short. Oh, how I wish in some months I would get a phone call that ended this hell and brought him back to me. I feel like telling her over and over again how wonderful I think this is because I cannot have it, and she can, and it's going to bring healing and blessing, and somehow in all of it there is Providence.
Boise here we come.
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