The Year of Ezra Lucas
Today is the last day of the year of Ezra Lucas. If time is a healer, I'm greatful for each day that passes and I'm closer to the possible reunion with this precious little boy I long to hold again, but part of me is so sad to be moving away from his life, his birth on June 25 and even his death on the 29th of August. The months I was pregnant with him, the few months we were in Alaska and then living as a family of 5 were honestly the best days of my life, and they all occured in the year that will end tonight at midnight and because of that I'm feeilng melancholy and sad. I'm feeling like I want to stay right here in 2007 close to those times. I'm afraid that time will soften my memories of his feel, smell and touch.
Inside I'm asking time to stop, right here where my mental pictures are sharp, can even create images of Ezra and remember so well what he feels like, but time is viscious in this and it keeps going no matter how desperatly I want it all to stop.
I hope this new year is kind to us, I can't say that 2007 wasn't, it gave us our best and our worst and hopefully we are better for it.
Comments
Wish you a blessed new year!
I am contacting you because I am working with the authors of a book about blogs, and I'd like to request permission to use a photograph of yours in this book. Please contact me at hannah@wefeelfine.org, and I'd be happy to give you more information about the project. Please paste a link to your blog in the subject field. Your assistance is greatly appreciated.
Sincerely,
Hannah
hannah@wefeelfine.org